THEN: Metatron, third trial (cure a demon), Abadon.

NOW: Do you remember “Wendigo” waaaaaay back in season one? No? CLIP! (“Wendigo” was one of my LEAST favorite early eppys). The guy from that episode wasn’t so freaked out that he didn’t go back in the woods, and this time, he doesn’t make it. His lady friend is not happy about the exploded bits of him strewn about the cabin.

Meanwhile, in the Cave of Letters, Sam and Dean are scouring the MoL files, and Sammy is totes illin’.  Castiel joins the boys and is having a hard time healing from his wound, but an even harder time healing the bromance with Dean. Dean is giving Cas the super-cold shoulder, and won’t even talk to him. Cas tries to apologize, but Dean is not having ANY of it. Oh, Dean. 🙁 This is not the Dean and Cas romance I love, dammit. Sammy pleads Cas’ case, but Dean is all, I want to stab him in the neck, the fact that I haven’t stabbed him is extraordinary. Harumph. DEAN! Stop being a dick.

Sam and Dean find a super secret room in their lair, and damn if it isn’t some kind of dungeon. This place IS the TARDIS! Seems as though back in the ’50s some MoL types were doing doing experiments on demons. I bet you can guess what they were trying to do… C’mon, you can figure it out! I’ll give you a sec…

That’s right, they were trying to cure demons! How convenient and relevant to the story!

So, Sam, Dean and Cas have a movie night, (complete with Jiffy-Pop) where they watch one of the first failed attempts at curing a demon. The person running the camera is a pre-posessed Abadon. It is creepy and preisty, and this is something the boys haven’t seen before. So they head off to find the one living priest from the flick, in St. Louis. Sam and Dean get an idea. Also, Sammy! Cover your mouth when you start hacking up blood. Sheesh.

In an attempt to make things right with Dean, Castiel heads out on a shopping expedition to replenish the low supplies at the Cave of Letters. It is hilarious and sweet, and we see how much Cas cares for Dean, by picking up some awesome Dean-centric things at the convenience store. The list includes: beef jerky; toilet paper; a copy of Dean’s favorite skin mag, Busty Asian Beauties; a sixer of beer, and almost a dozen eggs. After making quite a mess, Cas threatens the clerk for pie, and I can barely stand how damn cute this scene is.

And then Metatron makes his presence known. The two angels go off for a pow-wow, where Metatron (“In public I go by Marv.”) has a few trials of his own for Cas. Seems as though without the archangels up in Heaven, things have gone in the pooper, and Cas beats  himself up for being so bad at leading them. CLIP! Marv wants to shut the Pearly Gates and put all the angels in a room and hash it out. He is sweet and naive thinking that will work, but he lures Cas to a crepe place in Ojai to meet a waitress who happens to be the offspring of an angel and a human. A Nephilim, and Castiel has to cut her heart out as the first trial. Brutal.

Seems as though the 19th attempt to cure a demon back in the day was the jackpot. The priest was jabbing the demon with doses of his own purified blood (Did you hear that, Sammy?). It took 8 hours and 8 doses, but it finally worked. Voila! This gives Dean the bright idea  to dig up the pieces of Abadon and reassemble her and give it a go. This turns out to be a bit of a terrible idea.

The boys sew Abadon back together and fill her in on the deelio. They didn’t reattach her hands and are feeling quite superior because of the bullet. CLIP! The boys get a call from Crowley, and THEY LEAVE ABADON TO TAKE THE CALL. Sheesh. While the boys are gone, she gets her disembodied hand to remove the devils trap bullet lodged in her noggin and takes her leave. Boys! Never leave a super demon unattended!

So now, Crowley is killing the people that Sam and Dean have saved over the years, leading our boys on a little CLIP! tour of days gone by. Wendigo guy (I don’t care so much) and the cupcake witch lady (Yeah, not so much). Crowley calls to boast, like he does, and they learn that the next victim on the list is Sarah. CLIP! Freaking Sarah, the art dealer from “Provenance”. Oh.My.God. I LURVE Sarah. Her and Sam would have totally married and had adorable babies if it wasn’t for the life. Damn you, show!

Back in Ojai, Castiel and Marv are stalking the Nephilim though the park. She totally calls them out, as she can see their halos. She pleads for her life, but then attacks the angels as her eyes go all glowy. Suddenly, it seems easy for Cas to rip her heart out. Before she chokes out Marv, Cas stabs her with his angel sword and BOOM.

We get a quick Sarah update when Sam and Dean barge in on her in an Indy hotel room while on a arty scouting trip for her Dad. It seems she has married a search and rescue guy and has a wee one. She is still awesome and lets Dean anti-demon tag her room while Sam and her catch up. It is sweet and it breaks my god damned heart. The brief conversation has all the marks of two people who know they missed their chance to be together, and it makes what happens next even more tragic. Well played, show.

Crowley calls and starts the countdown. The boys quickly realize that they aren’t going to be ambushed by Crowley’s minions, but he has cast a spell. Sam and Dean rip the room apart with crazed ferocity looking for a hex bag, as Sarah writhes and chokes on the floor. Sam and Dean fail in saving Sarah as Crowley throws the tag line of the show in their faces. “Saving people, hunting things. The family business.” It is awful.

Crowley may have finally gotten what he wanted after this display. Dean throws the phone against the wall, revealing the hex bag that would have saved Sarah. GUH. Dammit.

The beautiful boys return to the Cave of Letters, dejected. Sammy is gutted. Dean is still trying to figure out a way to win, but Sammy… Sammy thinks that maybe this is the time to give in. Take the deal. That look on Sammy’s face is not encouraging.

Quotes!

Sam: “Honestly, my whole body hurts. I feel nauseous and like I’m starving at the same time, and everything smells like rotting meat.” Dean; “I’ve had that hangover, man. Jaeger.”

Castiel: “Morning. I like this place. It’s orderly.” Sam: “Give it a few months. Dean wants to get a ping-pong table.”

Castiel: “Where’s the pie?” Clerk: “I think we’re out.” Castiel (grabbing clerk): “You don’t understand. I need pie.” (Awwwwwwwwww. How cute is Castiel?)

Castiel: “You’re Metatron? THE Metatron?” Metatron: “Please. In public, it’s Marv.”

Waitress: Cool coat.” Castiel: “No actually, it’s quite warm.” Waitress: “Cute and funny. Okay.” Metatron: “Should have picked a better looking vessel.”

Sam: “So you really think this will work?” Dean: “Dude, we got needles, we got thread, we’ve seen “Young Frankenstein” about a thousand times. Yeah, we’re golden.” Sam: “Bleh. This is gonna be disgusting.”

Abadon: “Crowley? The salesman?” Dean: “Try the King of Hell.” Abadon: “This is a joke, right?”

Sarah: “No, you’re not, you’re not the same. Look it’s been years, and I can’t even imagine the things you’ve been through. But I don’t know, you just seem more focused. Confident. Like, like you know what you want. You grew up, Sam. I do miss the old haircut, though.”

I was very happy with this episode. It set up what was pretty obvious as far as who the third trail involved, but gave us a nice punch in the gut with the death of Sarah. And the best shopping scene ever with our sweet little angel Castile doing his best to make amends. Looking forward to the season finale!

Next: Crowley is the third trial. (DUH!)